Kellie Leitch very much wants you to believe she's a sincere candidate and not a carnivorous monster from Omicron Persei VIII stuffed into a humanoid skin sac.

Which is why she's released an eight-minute video to sell her immigrants-are-scary plan directly to you, the voter.  In it, she stares vaguely off into the distance at random intervals, meanders around her office, and practices smiling mid-sentence; all in front of a camera that sways woozily around the room.  It's a hilariously abortive attempt to seem real.

It's the most-watched thing Leitch has produced.  Unfortunately for Leitch, it's not popular because of her rhetoric or ideas, but because it's such a bizarre train-wreck.

If you're the type that buys into such nonsense, it's a genius distraction.  A masterstroke that's drawn in eyeballs by the hundreds of thousands, tricking the viewers into absorbing her message through subliminal osmosis, or some such bullshit.

Let's assume for a moment purposefully looking like an awkward doofus while peddling soft-focus racism for clicks wasn't the plan.  Let's try to take Leitch seriously, and maybe even literally.

But to do this, you've got to listen to the video without watching it.  It's too easy to get distracted wondering what could possibly be so interesting on the ceiling that she needs to look at it every 28 seconds.  Listening to it won't eliminate the existential strangeness of it—her cadence is really out there—but it's as good as it'll get.

When you do that, some things reveal themselves.  The key to her whole pitch I think comes right near the end.  After several minutes of talking about how important it is for border cops to interrogate immigrants to find out what's in their heart of hearts, Leitch tries to blunt opposition to her proposals by saying she's the only one who's sincere about it.

"This is a common sense policy that the media and my opponents have portrayed as something it is not.  Do not listen to them," she says.  Don't trust anyone else, trust only me, essentially. (Donald Trump's "I alone can fix it" line comes to mind, but I digress.)

But having Leitch ask Tory voters to believe her is one hell of a stretch.  Listening to her in this video, you get the distinct impression Leitch was shown the encyclopedia definition of "sincere" just before the cameras started rolling.

She attempts throughout the video to put on an air of chumminess.  It's the sort of mode you see many candidates attempt.  Leitch is just trying to be a regular Jane politician wearing a Dracula jacket you'd want to have a beer with.

But what kind of human person talks like this over a couple pints?  "Canada is an opportunity.  An opportunity to work hard and provide for one's self and one's family.  It's an opportunity and responsibility to give back to one's community once one has enjoyed success.  And to help those who need a hand."

(I've not transcribed the several excruciating pauses in that.  But believe me, dear reader, they're in there.)

One gets the distinct impression that one has never been in an informal social setting with one's fellow citizens.

This was in a section how Canadian values are all about goin' to Tim Hortons, and lending your neighbour a cup of sugar to put in their Tim Hortons coffee, and how those immigrant kids who hang out at Tim Hortons are probably harbouring evil thoughts and they never should have been let into Canada because of quotas.  Or something.

Under her plan, Leitch says, newcomers will be screened to make sure they are not only aware of these ideas, but agree with them.

If she was good at this, if she was able to convincingly have a chat with a camera, she might be more dangerous.  She might be able to sell voters on punishing immigrant's thought crimes and interrogating tourists.  But she's not good at this.  She's terrible.

When she tells viewers "do not listen to" anyone else on immigration, she fails because she's impossible to believe.  You could see buying into her pitch, if its central argument wasn't predicated on her being sincere.

If Leitch really wanted voters to believe in her ideas, she should probably try believing in them herself.